CLUSTER (*@^$!!

Despite the fact that my child was born at a hefty 10lbs+, he is still an infant and prone to endure infantile things.  Like growth spurts.  What most folks don't know is that growth spurts bring with them an enormous need for additional food.  When that food is produced by Mom, there are long days and nights with no sleep.

J is in his second round of Cluster Feedings.  (Dun, Dun, DUN!)  The first time around nearly killed my nipples (We will discuss this at length in a future post.  All you ever want to know about nipple care will be addressed!  Yay!)  Now that we are suffering this parental nightmare again, I am pretty sure that my child with the man-sized hands and feet is going to start walking soon.  College anyone?

Are you questioning my melodrama?  Often, I will begin feeding with one boob.  Then, after 15 to 20 minutes (I let him "milk" it) I will switch to the other.  My starving child will hungrily suck down everything.  And then, demand to return to the first boob to root around for more.  This goes on for HOURS.  Sometimes, he will fall asleep momentarily.  Sometimes, I will, too.  Not long enough, however, to get rested.

While I dislike the idea of supplementing with formula (GASP!) I am completely willing to do it - if only to get a little bit of sleep.  Constant feedings annihilate my ability to pump excess.  In essence, there is NO excess.  (We blew through the breast milk bottles that I had accumulated in just the first day of this terror.) Therefore, the only way for the Hub to assist with a feed is to mix up a lovely batch of formula.  We don't replace breast milk with formula all day long.  Once or twice is all I need to get just a little shut eye.

Oddly, even with the above argument sounding logical and true, the scenario is the perfect storm for what I call the Guilt Formula. . . (I know.  I'm SO pun-ny!) so I have to take it a bit further.

I have to give my baby a bottle of formula every now and then so that I can remain somewhat physically (and mentally) stable.  With just a little bit of rest, I can pump an extra bottle of breast milk for reserve and hopefully eliminate the formula need altogether.  With just a little bit of rest, I am able to breast feed for hours on end without passing out and crushing my child.  (Yeah.  That's a little extreme, but seriously, worst case scenario, people!)  So, really, in order to get through this growth spurt, I think a couple bottles of the Devil are A - Okay.  (Not really, but it is a plan. . . and with so little sleep, it's the best one I have!)