SHARP LIKE A KNIFE

I'm not stupid.  Neither are you.  But everyone else most definitely is.

In honor of our not-to-be-found stupidity, I have created a list of T-Shirt designs that I must create for myself.

1.  NAH.  I'M JUST FAT.

2.  DON'T TOUCH MY BELLY.  REALLY.
     Also available in the "Wish Creed Motif":  I WISH YOU *WOULD* TOUCH MY BELLY.
     Or, the minimalist design which features a crossed-out hand outline and the words:  I WILL CUT YOU.

3.  FIRST ONE WHO SMELLED IT - DEALT IT.

4.  MOO.

5.  WHERE'S THE BATHROOM?
     Available in several languages!

6.  A FACEHUGGER GOT ME.

In only have 20 more weeks to enjoy my own snark before I have to put a limit on it for child safety. . .